TERMS & RUGDITIONS
Last Updated: Whenever we felt like it

By accessing or using this website, you agree to be bound by these legally non-binding but spiritually binding Terms & Rugditions (“T&R”), as recognized by the Sacred DAOs of Onchain Law. If you disagree with any part, we respectfully suggest you close the tab and reflect on your risk tolerance.

1. NFA
– All content provided is for informational, satirical, and/or entertainment purposes only.
– Nothing on this site constitutes financial advice. If you made a profit, yes I am a genius. If not, it was never financial advice in the first place. DYOR and consult your neighborhood MEV bot.

2. Rug Tolerance Disclosure

By proceeding, you:

– Accept all possible permutations of soft rugs, hard rugs, and rugs disguised as staking rewards
– Understand that “community-owned” may mean “dev-multisigged”
– Acknowledge that up-only is not a sustainable business model

3. Consent Mechanism
By connecting your wallet, you authorize us to glance at your chain history and quietly judge your portfolio. We retain the right to meme you publicly for buying that derivative project in late 2022.

4. Governance
Your vote counts. But just like in real democracies, snapshots are ceremonial and we host a Discord poll to pretend.

5. Max Pain Enabled
By using this site, you acknowledge the inherent risks of the crypto ecosystem, including but not limited to:

– Unexpected or unexplained gas fees
– Cloned contracts from legacy protocols repurposed with new branding
– The haunting realization that your PFP cost more than your rent

6. Your Data, Our Yield
By using the site, you understand that:

– If it’s free, you’re the product.
– If it’s paid, you’re still the product, but you get to call it “web3.”

7. Dispute Resolution Layer
All conflicts shall be settled via:

– Onchain PvP
– Shitpost Combat
– Trial by Twitter Spaces

The ruling of the meme court is final and may be enforced by automated slashing mechanisms.

8. Real-World Utility Disclaimer
Any claim of “real-world utility” is purely metaphorical. Touching grass remains unsupported by this protocol.

9. Termination Clause
To terminate this agreement, simply say “wen refund” three times in a mirror and whisper “I miss TradFi” into a hardware wallet

10. Final Blessing
We wish you luck on-chain. May the next bull run pardon you, the validators validate you, and the devs not disappear.